A Rough Week With Little Progress
Have you ever been working on a big project, and you look around and think, “There’s not much left! I’ve almost got this thing wrapped up”? But the closer you think you’re getting to that finish line, the further away it seems to appear? Yeah. That’s how this studio project has been feeling to me.
I promised y’all an update on the progress today, and I had high hopes that I would have the cabinets in the office area of the studio finished by today. Not only did that not happen, but I really haven’t accomplished much since the last time I showed you the progress, which was right after I had installed my faux crown molding around the top cabinets and the cubby bridge.
Literally all that I’ve gotten done since then is add wood filler to the nail holes and cracks, and get half of the cabinets sanded. So now they look like this, with the right half of the cabinets ready for primer (I’ve decided to caulk after priming), and the left half still looking like it has chicken pox…
I had such high hopes, but the fact is that Matt has had a very rough week. And when Matt has a rough time, more of my time is required to care for him, so that leaves less time for me to work on projects. The week started off fine. Monday was normal, so that’s when I was able to get the wood filling and quite a bit of sanding done.
But then Matt had a terrible Monday evening and night. And his terrible evening and night turned into my terrible evening and night. So by Tuesday morning, I was so exhausted that I could barely keep my eyes open or function. He didn’t even get out of bed that day, so that meant that we ate lunch in the bedroom.
I can’t stand eating meals in the bedroom, but when you have a husband dealing with a chronic disease that leaves him too exhausted to get out of bed on some days, you learn to do what you have to do. So we ate while watching a show, and as soon as I was finished eating, I fell asleep (not on purpose) and slept until 7:30pm!!! I couldn’t believe it when I woke up at 7:30!!! Y’all, I’m not the kind of person to take a nap during the day. That’s just not something I do. But clearly I was exhausted, both mentally and physically.
So that day was completely shot. After sleeping all afternoon, and waking up to Matt still having a hard time, the last thing on my mind was work. Then Wednesdays are my “lunch with mom and Rod” day. (Rod is my brother.) And Wednesday evening is our church group that meets at our house. So there was no time for studio progress on Wednesday.
I felt certain that I could get a lot done yesterday, but nope. That didn’t happen. For reasons I won’t go into (but dealing with a medical-related appointment), yesterday was such a bad, disappointing, discouraging day for Matt (and for me) that Matt ended the day in tears saying, “I feel hopeless.” That just about tore my heart out. The day ended with both of us in a very bad mindset. So needless to say, studio projects were the last thing on my mind yesterday as well.
And that brings us to today. The studio cabinets are just about in the same state of doneness that they were on Monday when I went to bed. The good thing is that Matt and I both got great sleep last night woke up this morning feeling much better. (It’s amazing what a good night’s sleep can do for one’s mindset and mental health!) First thing this morning, Matt was laughing and joking around. We were both laughing together. The mood seemed lighter, and he even said, “I’m doing much better emotionally today.” After yesterday, that was a relief to hear. Matt is generally a very upbeat, happy, lighthearted person, so when he gets down and even says he feels hopeless, that’s a very serious thing. It’s very rare for him to get in that state of mind, and I’m so thankful for that.
So front here on out, I think I need to adopt the same mindset with my studio that I have with our addition. I’m not going to get stressed about it, and I’m not going to promise that I’ll get this thing done that that specific date. I need to have more of a “it’ll get done when it gets done” attitude about it, and keep the stress low. Both Matt and I will benefit from that. The fact is that Matt has had a harder time ever since he was in the hospital last October, and he has required much more of my time and attention than he did before. I don’t understand why that has happened, but life is different for us now than it was before. And obviously, he’s much more important than any home project I might have in progress.
So here’s to hoping that I can get more work done on these cabinets today and tomorrow. But if not, I won’t stress about it. They’ll get done when they get done. 😀 In the meantime, I can always stare at the one finished wall in the studio. This one still makes me smile.
Addicted 2 Decorating is where I share my DIY and decorating journey as I remodel and decorate the 1948 fixer upper that my husband, Matt, and I bought in 2013. Matt has M.S. and is unable to do physical work, so I do the majority of the work on the house by myself. You can learn more about me here.
Wishing health and happiness to you and Matt. Your priorities are on target and that thought alone can push the stress away. You are doing the right things for the right reasons at the right good time.
That wall appearing in a post makes me smile too. Godspeed.
SO well stated!
Thank you for sharing your journey with us, both with the renovations and just life in general. It is a good reality check – life doesn’t always go to plan, but we can still live each day as it comes. Wishing you and Matt good health and happiness!
What a positive outlook. Send love to you and Matt!
Sending positive vibes to both of you.
YES take the pressure off yourself! As you said; it will get done when it gets done.
This will sound like a lecture from a complete stranger, but as a retired RN, senior citizen and nap embracer I wholeheartedly advocate for the restorative properties of naps and good sleep in general. I nap often during the day because I don’t sleep well at night. It’s my body saying “your battery is low, let’s recharge.” You have a husband with a chronic condition that isn’t going to resolve, only get worse with a lot of ups and downs. During the low times, I wouldn’t give a fig about projects, other people or schedules (real or made up). All of this is to say, ditch the timeline, focus on your days with Matt and a lot/most/all of us will be here when you return. Take care of your needs, his needs and above all sleep. And do not apologize for it.
Lecture over. Glad you and Matt weathered this storm. Enjoy your weekend.
Kristi – You come first, you must take care of yourself in order to take care of Matt. If that means naps, take a nap. Matt comes in a very close second, your love for him is so evident in the way you care for him in every way. You are lucky to have each other. Projects are last, they will get done when they get done. Do NOT let the projects rob you of time with Matt, rest or caregiving. You started this blog for a variety of reasons but one of them was your love for DIY and wanting to share your knowledge, do not let arbitrary timelines change that. If your love for DIY dies it will become a job, not a love. Don’t let that happen. You know your priorities, your followers understand and and will be here whenever you are able to post. You don’t need to post every day, maybe you should think about changing the schedule from 5 days a week to maybe 3 or even 4. Praying for you and Matt.
Yes to all Cathy said. Praying that God will give you & Matt peace, strength, wisdom, and provision.
Perfectly stated. I agree with you 100%. Thank you! We all need this “lecture” at some point.
So sorry that Matt has had such a bad few days. Of course he takes priority! The studio cabinets and finishing other projects will get done in due time. Please tell Matt that I, and I’m sure all your followers, wish him all the best!
Your personal life, with the needs it has, should ALWAYS be top priority. Matt’s and your physical and mental health are #1 before anything or anyone. If you need a day or a month, I would not mind, as long as I knew you both were okay! Don’t feel like you need to explain, just say “We needed personal time.” Also, if you need to vent about anything, that’s okay with me also! We all need an outlet for things on our mind, and if you can’t release it, you get frustrated. So if you just need to scream, SCREAM HERE! =-)) Like you said, it will get done when it’s done!
🙏’s for you both
Kristi,
Your family is most important. Taking care of your family is necessary, and all of your DIYing will indeed get done when it gets done. Having no timelines on your DIYing is a great way to take care of Matt and keep your spirits up too. I am glad to know Matt is feeling better, and that you are getting caught up on rest with naps. You are doing exactly what your supposed to do. Have a blessed day and weekend.
Praying for Matt and for you as his support system!!!! You have your priorities right by focusing on Matt first!!!
Kristi we can wait and we’ll stick with you through it all! Take time with your sweet Matt. You both live out a Christian marriage in such a precious and beautiful way. I love what you do with your home and projects and what you teach us! But the love and commitment you and Matt share is priceless. It’s such an inspiration and blessing to me. Saying the vows is one thing, living them out is another. You my sister live it out. And it is obvious he adores you right back. Praying for you both 🙏🏻
God bless you and Matt!
Prayers for you and Matt. You are doing an amazing job being a full time nurse and working on your house.
🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
So sorry to hear that Matt has been having such a tough time. I will be praying for him.
Being a caregiver myself, I’ve had to come to the same conclusion; it will get done when it gets done!
That’s the only thing that keeps me sane!
Stressing about it only makes it worse.
You have done an amazing job with your home. I have so enjoyed joining you in your endeavors. You are an inspiration!
Be easy on yourself! I know all your followers are with you for the ride, however long it takes! Love all your work!
God bless you both. 🙏
So sorry Matt and you had a few bad days. Don’t sweat it because there is no timeline for you to complete your projects. Life has a way of throwing obstacles in our way and you do a great job of handling things. Hope you have a great weekend and Happy St. Patrick’s Day
Matt has to come first. Glad he is feeling better which allows you to feel better. It will get done when it gets done is a good attitude to have. Otherwise you are too stressed. I am making rugs from 2.5″ strips of fabric and I have fabric EVERYWHERE in my sewing room. It is a huge mess, but my plan is it will get done when it gets done. That, however, is not my husband’s plan. He likes everything nice and organized. Poor Hubby!
<3 Prayers for both of you!
Kristi, I had written a paragraph’s worth of dissertation regarding your post, and then erased it. Instead, here is my heartfelt comment: much love to you and Matt, and your family.
I’m so sorry that Matt was going through a bad time and the news from his doctor wasn’t what you both were hoping for. I know you’re excited to finish your studio and hope you don’t feel pressured by needing to get it done for your readers. In the mean time, enjoy the beautiful wall of cabinetry and wallpaper that is complete.
That’s the best way to handle Matt’s condition and your remodeling. I have health issues that prevent me from doing much. I AM a doer not sitter. But I’ve learned to make allowances. It’s not easy but it is necessary.
So sorry for the rough week…especially because of Matt’s problems and sadness. I am glad he is feeling better, and I pray for you both. I totally agree with your new thoughts on progress…Matt and your health, and rest, are WAY more important than any project, and since you know it will get done, and we will all be here to watch, whatever the timeline, should make it much less stressful. I actually love when a few days go by, and I have a new exciting post to enjoy. Don’t make this stressful for you…make it relaxed and give us something to look forward to. Best wishes to you and Matt.
Praying for health and happiness for you and Matt.
I admire Matt for his positive outlook and your ability to care for him while doing so many other things.
I just shared a thought with my husband on how sad it is that we are taught to believe we must, be doing, be productive, always accomplish something in a day! This thought came to me because my MIL feels guilty enjoying her coffee until 9am now that she’s retired! Its so very sad that we dont take more time to do absolutely nothing!!
Feeling great compassion for you! You have your priorities straight.
Be gentle with yourself ❤️ You and Matt are the most important things to worry about and the rest can wait.
Sending love to both of you.
I am holding you close in prayer. May thr healing light of God’s love envelop you both.
I’m glad to hear both you and Matt are doing better. Have a lovely weekend.
Don’t sweat it. You and Matt are the most important thing and if you get stressed, he will too. Take it from me, life is really short and when you love someone, it’s even shorter.
You’ll get it done sooner or later. As my mother used to say, in a hundred years no one will know the difference.
Take care of yourself and enjoy your life.
Your friends here have said it all, Kristi. I teared up over you and Matt and then again after reading these heartfelt comments. How ironic to not really know anyone in person and yet I feel like we are friends. The same is really true for you and Matt. We know how precious Matt is to you and he is to us also.
Chronic illness is so difficult. The clue for me is your mention of all the equipment you need to care for Matt. I can see what a challenge it is for you physically on a daily basis. You are a fine example of courage, endurance, and willingness. Matt is enduring also. Get your rest so the laughs will continue.
The house won’t run away. The projects will be done when you get to them.
Yes, you both will be in my prayers too.
I’m so sorry this was a difficult week for y’all. Sending good vibes for a peaceful weekend and hoping for a more robust future for Matt. I’m so glad you are taking care of yourself as well. You do what you need to do to stay healthy and less stressed. We will be here for y’all.
I’m so sorry life has been rough lately.
Hi Kristi. A lot of people have mentioned that you and Matt are in their prayers. You both are in mine as well. I can ask my prayer group at church to add you both in prayer as well if you would let me ask them.
I like Matt. We don’t hear from him but your blog reveals a lot. I like that he lets you tend to him…not everyone in his position does it with grace. I like that he can laugh with you and has a good attitude…not everyone does. I like that you can go ahead and DIY on your home, and he doesn’t resent it. I like that you have both a cat and a dog…I know someone who considers that as taking attention away from them.
I like you. Your attitude is a lesson for all of us. I agree with Elaine Ness. You are both precious to us. I sincerely hope that Matt believes it.
Have a good weekend you two.
God bless. Linda
I’d love for your prayer group to pray for us! Thank you. 🙂
They will get done when they get done. I will read your posts no matter the topic. I will make a point to comment on them all. I will remember to hit “like” on FB and IG. I believe that all helps and the only way I can help someone I’ve been reading for 14 years I think? Someone who I look forward to hearing from. Someone who is living their life the best way they can, no matter what that life is at any given point.
Tend to Matt, rest when you need to, enjoy your family and church group times, get Matt out in the van when ya can—these are the important things. Work on projects when you are up to it, and can enjoy it.
Love your stories, btw! One of my fav ways to hear from you!